More of Mercy done

Here's a little more of Mercy painted:

I've finished the background, and am starting on her body:

Cakes!!!

I've also been making a few cakes; most of them are 12-14" square, apart from the obviously not ones!


It started with my BFF's eldest's wedding cake - I helped decorate that, then it just carried on:

Next up, was my daughter's Hen Do, which was a festival themed party in our garden. 

She had wanted a naked wedding cake, but her fiance didn't, so I made one for her hen do instead. 

Then I got carried away, and made a Pyramid Stage, Glastonbury Festival cake as well, with Beyonce on stage. I made 3 smaller gluten free and vegan cakes, as well:

Then I made a TARDIS birthday cake, because, let's face it, everyone needs at least one TARDIS in their lives!

It's very wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey! I forgot to add the supporting rods, and had to start all over again :(

Next was a Volkswagen camper-van cake:

And I followed that with a few much easier, flat square cakes; one for the NHS 70th birthday party, one pre-election in May this year, and one post-election:

This is the newly elected Leader and Deputy Leader of Trafford Council, holding my We #turnedtraffordred cake. The red is an outline of the borough where I live.

Mercy outline

This is a lovely image to paint; I started off with the outline:

Next up, I started painting the boulders:

I'll add a couple more progress shots over the next few days :)

How time flies! Mercy from Overwatch for Tofystedeth

I can't believe how long it is since I last posted! I've still been painting, albeit at a much slower pace than in the past, I've also got sucked into a few craft related things along the way.

It's time to post a few updates, so here goes!

This one is for Tofystedeth, and is Mercy, from Overwatch.

Here's the original source image:

And here's a close-up:

I started this in Cambodia, where I'd gone to visit my son, LewieP of Savygamer, but still haven't finished it :( 

I'm almost there, just the face to finish off, but I'll share it step by step.

International ME Day 2017

TL;DR: it's International ME day, I've written stuff about it:

It's International ME day today, 12th May 2017, so it's time for my annual post about living with ME.

I've had ME since 17th August 2005; almost 12 years now. It is an illness that has turned my life upside down, changed it beyond measure, but it has its blessings as well.

I'm writing this laid on my sofa after about 5 hours sleep last night - a relatively normal amount of sleep for me. Yesterday, I did too much, ferrying my mum around to do the things she needed to do. She forgets I can't do the same as she can (she's 81!), and that I'll pay for such a high (for me) level of activity.

This year, though, I want to tell you about the blessings ME has brought into my life. Sounds strange, but there are quite a few.

I've had to slow down. Smell the flowers, watch the bees, take pleasure in slower paced things.

Because of this (sorry, Miss Ganley, I shouldn't start a sentence with a preposition, but I can't remember why!), I have more time to do things, and have learnt to prioritise what's and who is important, and cut out the business.

I've learnt to appreciate being able to do simple things.

I have definitely learnt to appreciate the wonderful friends I have. If you're reading this on FB, you're definitely one of them!

I value the time people take to spend with me, whether irl, on the phone, or on line. Even a short message can change how I perceive myself and impact how I'm feeling.

I already knew how wonderful my husband and children were before I became ill; I see their compassion, thoughtfulness and love on a daily basis and truly value the support they give me. 

I really understand the value of support, both practical and emotional, and it's impact on people. Receiving support is as big a blessing as giving support - to both the giver and receiver equally, each are blessed. 

I truly understand how much God loves me, and how His plans for my life are so much better than mine. Jeremiah 29:11 is a verse I have held onto when things have been hard. 

I paint now, and my paintings go all over the world, blessing the receiver and the people that Oxfam support. If you're reading this on canvasandpaints you can see what I've achieved since having ME. If you're not, have a look anyway, you might be surprised!

Video games are fun! Geeks are awesome!!! Dr Who is awesomer (whoops, I already knew that, it just crept in unnoticed like Jaffa cakes do in my supermarket trolley!). 

False pride is dangerous, humility is better. I now use a mobility scooter to "walk" to my local town centre, rather than drive. It's getting me out into the fresh air, no one else cares, it was just in my head! It's quite good fun, as long as a) the battery doesn't run out again and b) it doesn't rain!

ME research is entering an exciting phase, with possible identification of cause just around the corner, next phase, maybe a cure!

My family are the best.

My friends are wonderful. I know I've said this already, but it can't be said too often. You are wonderful. You accept me for who I am, with my limitations, and love me. That is a precious gift. 

You don't have to be physically competent in order to have value. Being emotionally competent is just as valuable :)

There are many, many more blessings than these, I simply wanted to give you an idea about them. I'm not glad I have ME, but I am glad about the things I've learnt through having it. I long to be healed of this nasty, debilitating, painful illness, but until then, I'll carry on.

Thank you for taking the time to read this,

Shirley

The BBC made-over my back garden!!!

We moved house last year, to a bungalow, to help with my mobility problems. We had lived in a 4 storey Edwardian house, that was really impractical for me, so after a while of looking, we found our new house.

We needed to do some remodelling inside, which uncovered some structural problems which meant we couldn't move in for 5 months after we'd moved out of our old house!

The garden was a challenge too far for me, so I applied to a programme called "The Instant Gardener", and after a series of interviews and a recce, they chose my back garden as one of the gardens to do. 

I was taken out for the day, and returned to find a wonderful transformation - from a garden that I didn't know where to start, to a sci-fi themed garden.

They had created a portal (from the best ever videogame in the world) and painted my shed TARDIS blue!!

Here's a few pictures from before they started:

It was overgrown, I had no idea what things were, and more importantly, no energy to tackle it. I felt completely overwhelmed by the challenge!

Then, along came the BBC:

I have a Portal in my garden!!!!!

I utterly, utterly love what they did - with help from my husband and our good friend, Stuart. :) They completely transformed the garden, and gave us something I would never have dreamed of, made it completely manageable, and inspired us to take it further:

My mum had given me a chunk of money for my birthday, to buy a water feature; following my day out with the BBC, I knew exactly what I wanted, a pond!!

A couple of day's digging and sand laying by my husband, and we had a pond with a stream :) We carried on, with more help from Stuart, and from the money mum had given me, we finished the garden. When I say "we", I mean I made the drinks and the blokes did all the work!


Here's the pond, and you can see willow screening and cedar chippings behind it:

Looking from the TARDIS along the back of our garden:

 Next to the side of the house:

Looking towards the pond:

More of the Portal, plus a better view of the willow screening - we put that up to hide the tatty, but sound fence, and to give us and our neighbours a little more privacy:

 

 I absolutely LOVE our garden, and am so grateful to the BBC and The Instant Gardener team for the work they did in our garden. Kev and Stuart have worked their socks off, as well, and I now have a garden that I can enjoy, and the only work Kev has to do in it now is cut the grass and rake the leaves in the Autumn! I'm sure he'd like artificial grass soon :)

Lego Marvel Super Heroes almost done!

This has to be the longest it's ever taken me to finish a painting; Radiation has been so patient and understanding :)

I'm almost there now, just have to do the swooshes and outlining, then I'll be ready to post it off - I'll aim to do that over the weekend.

Here's where I'm up to:

I'm so sorry for the poor quality of the photo - it's using my iPad. I've found my camera now, but need to buy another SD card reader,, as I can't find my old one - downside of all my stuff being in storage from July - mid December during the protracted house move!

I'll go out now and buy one, so the finished pictures will be a better quality.

Lego Marvel Superheroes background finished

I'm quite tired today - had things to do over the last week or so that have left me without much energy, but I have painted. 

I've finished the background of @Radiation's painting, and just have the characters to finish, then the outlining left to do. I'm happy with how the background has turned out, and am thankful for the miniature brushes my BFF bought me a while ago, as they are so useful in this painting!

Here it is:

I'll do some more over the next few days :)

Lego Marvel Superheroes continued!

At last, I've done a little more painting! This must be the longest I've ever taken to complete something, but life and medication just keeps getting in the way :(

Radiation, who this is for, is an incredibly patient person thankfully. 

Anyway, here's a little more done - I've painted for a couple of hours this afternoon, concentrating on the right hand background, getting the buildings done. It doesn't seem much for a couple of hours painting, but it is quite detailed!

Here's a close-up of what I've done:

And here's the whole painting so far:

I'll be doing some more in a couple of days, I think.

Lego Marvel superheroes at last

It feels like I keep saying this: "I've not been well, I've been too tired to paint, I've finally paints a bit more".

Being medically retired from work has been harder to deal with than I first thought it would be. I'm still having investigations into the problems with my neck, left shoulder, hand and arm: tomorrow I go for nerve function tests, to confirm I have no median nerve in that arm, and to see if they can tell exactly what's going on.

I've been diagnosed with cervical stenosis at C5/6, on the left. That's why my left hand doesn't work properly any more, and it's just going to get worse. The neurosurgeon won't operate yet, as the risks are too high. I'll have to wait until I can't use my arm/hand/shoulder any more, or when the pain becomes unbearable.

That's why it's been tough, the last several months. I've been off work for 10 months now, and have tried several types of pain medication. Work are throwing me a retirement do - if you're based in the NW of England, and you need a job, try Pennine Care NHS Foundation Trust, they're a wonderful organisation to work for!

Enough of that; here's where I'm up to with the Lego painting:

The whole thing:

A close-up of the side that's almost finished:

Radiation is the most patient person - still waiting for this painting, without putting me under pressure to finish it quickly!

I'll update more, soon :)

Lego Marvel Superheroes sky done

This was fun! I like painting skies; there are so many shades and colours, even when it's just blue sky and a few clouds. Add storms moving in, and the colours are amazing!

Here's where I'm up to:

Lego background update

As all smaller paintings do, this is taking a while - I'm painting for about an hour each mornings, before it gets too hot, but the size means I'm focusing on the details more - there are no large, sweeping brushstroke a, I'm using my miniature brushes, instead.

I like this :)

Here's where I'm up to:

Lego Marvel Superheroes background started

LPD went for a run this morning, so I painted. He ran to Kos town and back - 16km, I started the background to Radiation's painting. 

Here it is:

Painting again!!! :)

Well, I've decided to stop feeling sorry for myself, and get back on with life again. My left arm isn't fixable, but life, with a few adaptations, must go on.

I'm on holiday for a week in Kos, and have brought a couple of paintings to do while I'm here. It feels so good to pick up a pencil to draw, and I'll be painting tomorrow.

So what am I doing? It's a Lego Marvel Superheros for Radiation:

This is a photo of the image I'm working on - I only have my iPad with me, so photo quality won't be great, I'm sorry!

Here's the pencil outline:

I'll start painting in in the morning - I don't like painting in artificial light, as colours look different, and what I think is a colour match turns out to be anything but!

It feels good :)

A brief update

Well, long time, no post!

I've had a challenging few months, cumulating in a difficult to accept, but very easy to make decision.

TL;DR: my left arm is packing up, I'm retiring.

The longer version:
For the past year or so, I've been having problems with my left shoulder, arm and hand, and in that easily done way, I've ignored it. In case you don't know, as well as having ME, I also have Poland's Syndrome, a congenital defect of the upper left quarter of my body, which means I have some missing muscles, bones and nerves. Thankfully, my heart and left lung aren't affected. I have slight scoliosis, a short arm and webbed 1" long fingers that don't move much. I've been getting pins and needles, been dropping my fork, and pain in my shoulder. I ignored it. The pain got worse until it started impacting my ability to drive, sleep and function. After X-rays, MRIs, nerve and muscle function tests, I've been told it's not fixable, take more drugs.

This has been quite hard to deal with - not the pain, but the losing function. It impacts my ability to drive, which then restricts what I can do, as I can't walk far. If I do drive, I hurt, so I have to take stupid meds, which then mean I can't drive, so I can't go out. 

I've been off work since the middle of April, and am now being medically retired, as I'm not safe to be at work on the drugs, and can't concentrate because of the pain if I don't take the drugs. My balance is affected, too, so I'm falling over a bit more.

My pension will be about half my salary, and because my condition has changed, I will receive more disability benefits. It will still be less than I currently earn, which will be a challenge in itself.

I've never lived to work, but my arm deciding to pack up on me has been very difficult to deal with. One consequence has been the loss of some things I enjoy - I can't play my guitar any more, as it hurts my left shoulder - I play left handed, have an Ibanez jumbo acoustic. It's now gathering dust. Sewing is a challenge, too - I make bridalwear as another hobby, but sewing hurts my left arm.

I'd stopped painting - mainly because I was zonked on the pain meds, but also because I felt rubbish.

I'm slowly coming out of the funk, and accepting what I can't change. I'm also starting to paint again, which actually helps with how I feel. I guess I'll just have to learn a new way of doing things, and try not to let it get to me. Next week I'll be starting the next painting, for Radiation. We've already had a conversation about my radio silence, so we're good.

I'm also going to continue my Doorways paintings; I'll be posting about them as well.

Also, commissions gratefully received!!

Updated Oxfam painting list

I thought I should update the painting list - this is the list where you donate a minimum of £50/$75 to Oxfam in exchange for a painting from me. You also meet my materials and postage costs.

Here's the list:  

Junpei: don't know yet

Radiation: Link or My Little Pony (for his daughter)

Tofystedeth

Custom Special

Anarchy

ArcticLancer

1ddqd - very happy to roll the painting up into a tube!!

I contact you when it's your turn, and I've just messaged Junpei to see what they would like me to paint. While I wait to hear from them, I'll carry on with a couple of side projects, and post updates of them, as well.

If you'd like to be added to the list, just let me know.

It's finished!!!

Yes, I've finally finished my Secret Santee's painting. ME doesn't half get in the way of painting, you know. 

Here's the whole thing:

And here's a couple of close-ups:

This was fun to paint!

I'm heading to my queue to contact the next person on the list to find out what I'll be painting next :)

It's that time of year again!

Yes, that's right, its International ME day.

For those of you who check out canvas and paints regularly, you'll have been expecting a post today, as you already know I have ME. For those of you who don't, here goes:

On August 17th 2005 I was half way through a 6 day cycling round North Wales holiday with my husband. This was about a month after having completed the Manchester to Blackpool bike ride in my fastest ever time of 5 hours 50 minutes - it is a 57 mile ride on road between the two places, covering some beautiful, hilly country roads.

We'd arrived in North Wales on the Sunday afternoon after dropping our then foster children back home to their grandparents - they lived with them and came to us for regular weekend breaks, to both support the children and their grandparents.

On the first day we went for a short ride, only doing 11 miles. On the second day, we did about the same, then we gradually increased it so that on the Wednesday we cycled 30 miles, and we were planning to do the same on the Thursday. When I woke up, I thought I was developing a cold, but so what? We went out anyway. We headed to Llandudno, a pretty Victorian town about 15 miles from where we were staying, but as the ride progressed, I started to feel lousy. We stopped at a chemist so I could buy some cold remedy, but I gradually started to feel worse and worse.

Mistake no. 1 was not asking Kev to cycle back for the car while I rested. Mistake no. 2 was me continuing to navigate. We got lost, and almost ended up on the A55 - a very, very busy dual carriageway that's not safe for bikes. The planned 30 mile ride got longer and longer as I tried to work out a route back, and I felt sicker and sicker. Eventually, we managed to find our way back to where we were staying; by then I was feeling pretty dreadful - the cold I thought I was developing felt much more like the 'flu.

I never recovered. I've not been back on my bike since; 10 years later it is gathering dust and cobwebs in my shed. It's hard to describe exactly what it is like, as how I feel can vary so much. The Spoon Theory sums it up pretty well, though.

I've learnt to manage this nasty illness, most of the time fairly successfully, sometimes not. I have relapses where I can barely walk for days, can't think clearly, can't even look after myself.  I rely on my family and friends for help, as there's so much I now can't do. We've moved to a bungalow as walking up stairs exhausts me and causes significant pain.

The hardest thing to cope with is the feeling of grief for what I've lost - the physical strength and capacity that I used to take for granted; being able to think coherently; having a memory that functioned. It took a while, and a CBT course to help me manage the negative emotions I had because of how little I can now do.

One of the best things has been painting - not only does it give me something so positive to do, that doesn't take up too much energy, but it is something very productive, that people appreciate, and raises money for Oxfam and Child's Play.

Another has been learning about the blessing of enabling people to help me - even complete strangers when I'm struggling in a shop - only last Saturday I was trying to do the food shopping, but I was in too much pain to bend down to pick up a box of eggs. My choice was either do without, or swallow my silly false pride and ask for help. Or, as I prefer to look at it, to give someone the gift of feeling good about themselves for helping someone. I asked another customer to help me by picking up a box of eggs for me. She did, I thanked her and she went away feeling good about herself because she had helped someone out.

I have to remember that it is a blessing to help another person, no matter how small that help is - even a bad man wouldn't give a child a stone if they were hungry.

I'm hoping to be part of the UK Rituximab trial at some point; that may lead to a cure for ME. I'll still paint, though.

For more information about ME, click here.

To donate to Oxfam, click here.

Just the outlining left to do!

As the title suggests, I'm almost finished! His has been a fun painting to do :)

Outlining next, then it's done!

Almost finished!

I've been busy painting this morning, and have almost finished the painting. I've just got to add the glow around MegaMan, then the flash of light at the top of his hand, then I'll be ready to do the outlining :)

Here it is:

Yes, still no camera! If anyone feels like donating one, let me know!!

I should have this finished by Friday, then I'll be posting it off to its very patient owner!